| |

Midlife Crisis in Women: A Step-By-Step Guide 2022

Sharing is caring!

If you’re reading these words, you might be a woman between 40-55+.

Maybe you’ve googled words like- midlife crisis, what is a midlife crisis, a midlife crisis in women, how to deal with a midlife crisis.

Or, maybe you just landed here by coincidence.

But I don’t believe in coincidence, do you?

This article may include affiliate links. Read full disclosure here.

midlife crisis in women

No matter how you’ve found yourself here and now, I am so glad you are here!

Let me start by saying I am not a doctor and don’t pretend to be one on the internet. I’m just a 58-year-old woman who has gone through a sh*t storm or two.

And I enjoy sharing my insight with other women in hopes it may be helpful.

Fair warning-I’ve run out of reasons to sugarcoat stuff.

Here’s the thing-No one makes it to almost 60 without learning a thing or two about a thing or two. And since I’m nearly 60, I’ve discovered that I like to keep things real.

That said, there’s a real good chance that I may sprinkle a bit of tough love throughout this article,

AND the odds are pretty darn high that I may drop a truth bomb or two. #truthbomb

I love me a good truth bomb. Don’t you?!

Are you in? Well then, buckle up, and let’s get going!

Midlife Crisis in Women

What is a Midlife Crisis?

While researching, I found out that “midlife crisis” is not an official diagnosis. Without a precise diagnosis, it’s challenging to find a firm definition.

In addition, a midlife crisis can look different for everyone.

A midlife crisis is a time of transition.

A midlife crisis can be a transition time of questioning one’s authentic identity and a “crisis” of self-confidence during the middle-aged years.

Midlife (whether it feels like a “crisis” or not) can be a season of revisiting the past, contemplating what lies ahead in the future, and coming to terms with the fact the second quarter of life is in full swing.

As I write, I am 58 and 1/2. If this is “halftime” for me- I will live until I am over 116 years old. Things that make you say HMMMM (thanks, Arsenio Hall)

A midlife crisis can become severe.

On a serious note: Midlife transitions (a midlife crisis) can be a dark time. It can lead to destructive behavior, lousy decision-making, spiraling out of control, and severe depression.

There are many instances where people feel so unhappy and out-of-sorts that they make impulsive decisions and even “blow up their lives” based on their emotions during a midlife crisis.

If you find yourself struggling and perhaps even depressed-please reach out and talk to someone. Find a therapist, a pastor, or a close friend.

Don’t try to white-knuckle your way through it alone.

What is the typical midlife crisis age?

While a midlife crisis age can vary, the typical period that people experience a midlife crisis is between 38 and 55. So that’s a pretty extensive age range if you think about it.

I was about 53 when I started showing some minor midlife crisis symptoms.

What can trigger a midlife crisis?

A midlife crisis can be triggered by a person’s growing age, inevitable mortality, and changes in lifestyle, such as a career change or perhaps a divorce.

During the middle-aged, crises can be made more difficult by perimenopause, menopause, clinical depression, and even PTS (post-traumatic stress syndrome).

These conditions require professional guidance and perhaps medical intervention.

Symptoms of a midlife crisis in women

What are the signs and symptoms of a midlife crisis in women?

A laundry list of symptoms signals you may be experiencing a midlife crisis. But, of course, symptoms vary from person to person.

Symptoms of a midlife crisis in women:

  • The feeling of restlessness and boredom
  • Panic attacks + Heart Palpitations
  • Mood swings + Increased irritability
  • Sleeplessness or over-sleeping
  • Increased use of drugs or alcohol
  • Obsessive concern about physical appearance
  • Lack of concern about physical appearance
  • Feelings of hopelessness
  • Depression + Anxiety
  • Loss of energy
  • Weight gain or weight loss
  • Lack of focus (brain fog)
  • Loss of interest in things once loved
  • Obsessive regrets of the past
  • Impulsivity + lousy decision making

How can you avoid a midlife crisis?

Perhaps avoiding a midlife crisis is to educate yourself about middle age. And to prepare for what may be coming your way. Preparation is the key.

In other words, midlife is the time to get your ducks in a row.

midlife crisis in women-life doesn't come with a remote

A midlife crisis doesn’t have to be a Crisis -does it?

This time of “crisis” doesn’t have to be a crisis unless we decide it’s a crisis.

We can choose if we want to believe that attitude is everything and that life is 10% circumstance and 90% attitude and response to said circumstance.

I’ll go ahead and throw this out there and see where it lands.

Maybe we can make a choice. We can view this time in our lives as an opportunity for personal growth and not as a crisis.

Could it be that midlife doesn’t have to be the beginning of the end? But instead, a new beginning!?

It can be a time to start dreaming about what you want for your life—a time of personal enlightenment and freedom. Growing older can be a good thing!

Stay with me.

The finish line is the beginning of another race

-Author unknown

You are the master of your destiny—the captain of your ship.

Life can deal a bad hand. No doubt about that. Such is life.

We cannot control what our spouses and children do, and God knows we can’t control all the nonsense going on today. So many things are simply out of our control.

HOWEVER. There is so much we can control! Think about it.

We can control what we put in our mouths daily, what media we consume, whom we spend our time with, what jobs we have, and where we live.

In addition, we control if we exercise or if we don’t.

It’s called free will.

And we all have it with a few exceptions. We (us, each of us) ultimately choose what we will do with this one beautiful life that we have been given!

And don’t forget about that idea I mentioned earlier. The idea is that life is 10% circumstances and 90% attitude and response to circumstances. Do you believe that? I do.

If that notion is true, then it’s also true that we get to decide. We are not just passengers along for the ride, no! We are in the driver’s seat.

The way I see it, there are two options. The first is to choose to dwell on the problems and stay stuck, allowing midlife to be a crisis-or second option; is we can roll our sleeves and get busy working on some solutions!

We can double down on ourselves and make the second half of our lives the best half.

Are you still with me? Then buckle up your seat belt, and let’s ride!

Dealing with midlife Crisis in women: A Guide

Midlife crisis in women-Get your hormones balanced


Get your hormones balanced.

It’s not lost on me that women typically experience midlife crisis symptoms when they enter perimenopause and menopause.

Raise your hand if you think that’s some coincidence. I say no.

Perimenopause and menopause cause a sh*t-ton boatload of problems, all of which can serve as a catalyst for a full-blown midlife crisis or mirror the symptoms.

When I hit what felt like a midlife crisis at 53 years old, I dug into the symptoms I was experiencing (hot flashes, insomnia, weight gain, migraines, low libido) and decided to get my hormones checked.


Related article: BHRT: Bioidentical hormones (my story)

It turns out my hormones and my Thyroid were all out of whack, and my adrenal function, along with my cortisol levels, we in the tank as well. No wonder I was miserable.

I got some hormones (BRHT pelleting) and thyroid meds and added some essential vitamins and supplements that I was missing. Within two months, I was feeling like a completely different human being!

You may be dealing with similar issues if you are a midlife woman over 40.

Never underestimate the power of hormones. Let me say that again for those of you in the back. NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF HORMONES.

Midlife crisis in women-Practice self-care


Make self-care a priority.

Self-Care is a buzzword these days. But, by definition, Self-care is the practice of actively protecting one’s well-being, health, and happiness! LOVE IT! 

For me, self-care had slipped through the cracks for years. During those “hardcore Mommy years,” -I did not make self-care a priority.

Instead, I put myself on the back burner.

Related article: The self-care alphabet: Self-care 26 ways

If I could go back, I would make a self-care routine a priority

It’s the whole oxygen mask on an airplane thing. You’ve got to help yourself first so that you can help others.

No matter what season of life you’re in, single kids, married with kids, midlife with or without kids, or a retired empty-nester- it doesn’t matter! Instead, self-care needs to be your priority.

I say this over and over and over because it’s just that important:

You’ve got to take care of yourself first. Period. End of story.

Midlife crisis in women-make big changes


Make some changes (big and small)

Midlife is an opportunity to make some tweaks and changes!

It could be as simple as rearranging your living room and organizing your closets and drawers (and that garage!) But, simplify, simplify, simplify.

If it doesn’t bring you joy or serve a purpose, it’s GONE!

Maybe it’s time for a plot twist!

Could it be high time to cut ties with that toxic friend? Or downsize to a smaller home? Or perhaps you need to make a complete career change?

It’s been two years since we downsized from a two-story to a one-story home. Moving is a pain, but it’s been so worth it! No more clutter weighing us down, less time dusting, and no more stairs!!!

Related article: How to Reinvent Yourself at 50!

Midlife crisis in women-dream, set goals, take action


Dream + make plans

Dream up some dreams for your life.

Do you want to travel the world? Learn how to paint? Maybe you want to learn how to play a musical instrument or chess? Always wanted to learn how to garden or perhaps to play tennis? You get the idea.

Have you let yourself dream? If not, it’s high time that you do.

Some practicals for dreaming dreams:

Make a Vision Board

Creating a vision board is a creative and fun way to put those dreams and goals front and center.

Set aside a few hours and get ready to get crafty! Pull together a poster board, old magazines, scissors, markers, stickers, and a glue stick.

Cut out pictures of things you love, would love to have, do places you want to go, etc.

Maybe it’s that white Tesla, that beautiful flower garden, and that sassy haircut- Then, add one piece at a time, creating a collage.

Voilà! A one-of-a-kind vision board!

Put it somewhere that you will see it daily. Spend time focusing on your vision board, and keep dreaming!

Related article: Creative hobbies for women over 50+

Create a dream journal + a goal planner

Journaling about how you feel and what you want in life is powerful!

Grab a journal just for your dreams. Use your morning quiet time and allow your dreams, wishes, and desires to pour out on the page.

Once you’ve sorted your dreams, you can develop an action plan!

Dream big. Set goals. Take action.

How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. It’s helpful to break down a dream or a goal into bite-sized pieces or action steps.

Start a bullet list of goals + action steps (Example: Goal: Set up a studio: Action Steps: Gather art supplies, buy work table and chair, find an online art class, etc.)

Block out time for your goals on your calendar and guard the time with your life.

-Tackle action steps one step at a time, + as you cross them off your list, you will become motivated to cross off the next and the next, building momentum.

-Get closer and closer to your dream every day!

Give life everything you’ve got!

Related: 100 affirmations for women

Please do your best & whatever you do, don’t half-ass it!

One of my favorite life values is the idea of always doing our best. No matter what. Some days our best is outstanding and goes well beyond the status quo, and other days we fall on our faces.

The idea of success or failure is not the point.

The point is to give it everything you’ve got.

You didn’t come this far only to come this far!

Matthew McConaughey says it better than I ever could. This quick video is worth the watch. It’s so convicting and motivating and makes perfect sense. And I love me some Matthew McConaughey, don’t you?

Related: Awesome Quotes for Women

Midlife crisis in women-Get your affairs in order


Do all things that you have been putting off

Get a passport. If you don’t already have one, get one! Or renew the one you’ve got! (you may need it for that trip you’ve always wanted to take!) Of course, you will also need to get one of those fancy driver’s licenses!

Contact a lawyer and have a will and medical directives drawn up. Of course, nobody wants to think about this stuff. But, it has to happen. It will make things easier for your loved ones who are already grieving.

I know some people go as far as to plan their funerals. If you are into this, great-but, I’m not there yet.

Talk to a financial adviser and get your finances sorted. Whatever your financial situation, you need to know where you stand and your options. (knowledge=power)

-Make health appointments. Make those appointments that you’ve been putting off. You know the ones.

  • Dental appointment (every six months)
  • See the dermatologist (if it grows, it goes!)
  • Have an annual mammogram and check your breasts monthly
  • Get a yearly physical and have your labs checked
  • Have your eyes checked and update your glasses prescription
  • Don’t forget your pelvic exam + Pap smear (I know)

Getting our affairs in order puts us in a place of power and gives us a sense of security and safety. I know I like to feel safe and secure.

I promise once you’ve checked all the things, you will feel like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders once you’ve got your poop in a group! LOL.

Midlife crisis in women-Believe in yourself!

Midlife can be a challenging time, especially during uncertain times.

The bottom line is life is hard. Midlife is hard. But as Glennon Doyle says, We can do hard things!

Just remember to be kind to yourself. Take one day at a time. Put one foot in front of the other. Do the next right thing and then the next, and so on.

Everything will be ok, and if it’s not OK-then, it’s not the end. Keep going. Don’t quit. Believe in yourself and your dreams.

You’ve got this!

XO, Christine

midlife crisis in women a users guide

Sharing is caring!

Similar Posts


  1. Wow girlfriend that is good! You can write!!
    I’ve been stuck in a rut for quite some time. Depressed. Anxiety. Working on making a change!
    I just love this article! So much I can take from it! I saw this first thing this morning and it has motivated me. You are awesome! Thank you!

  2. Christine, I think the is great advice to prevent a midlife crisis! Many of us spend our thirties and forties taking care of children and parents, and I think it all adds up. Great post! xo Nipa

  3. This is probably the best post I’ve ever read! Thank you for sharing this. It’s so hard at this time-kids gone, life so very different, but it can still be great once I get out of my head! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

  4. Really enjoyed reading! I love “don’t half ass it!”. Making plans and seeing things I want to do for the future is something I do. I also know what you mean about hormones. Mine is a different situation, as I have Ehlers Danlos Syndrome and hypermobility, so I have been on continuous BC pills for years. Once I am off, my doc suggests 55, then I may need hormone replacement. I have been wanting to get them checked for awhile.
    I think everyone had the idea for doc appts etc now but it is important to keep up with your health and stay on top of those appts. Making plans are so important for feeling secure, like you said.
    Enjoy your week!
    jess xx

  5. I started to have a midlife crisis when going through menopause and the doctors here were not much help, unfortunately. No hormone replacement here in Spain. Luckily it only lasted for 6 months and then I was back to normal again. It did make me more aware of taking care of myself. This was a good read and chock full of information.

  6. Taking things into m own hands has really helped me to move from a part time side gig, to creating what will help me through retirement. I have a good plan in place. Great topic

  7. Love this! I went through a similar phase, but I also had over 100 pounds to lose. I found that adding water, eating what I call the “Complete 3”, and adding movement balanced everything out naturally. That started at 42. Now at 51 1/2 I have maintained over 120 pound weight loss for about 8 years, and I feel better than I did in my 30’s.

  8. You and I are definitely singing from the same choir book on so many points here!
    What a fab post – there are so many great take aways and I’m looking forward to reading more of your blog!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.