Breaking Free from Limiting Beliefs (Lies) + 20 Ways to Heal

If I’m being honest, the hardest walls to climb are often the ones we can’t see.

They’re built quietly, brick by brick, out of fear, doubt, and old stories we didn’t even realize we were still telling ourselves.

I’ve experienced this myself, having struggled with limiting beliefs (or rather, lies) throughout my life.

These are self-limiting beliefs, quiet thoughts that shape how we see ourselves, what we think we deserve, and how much love, joy, and possibility we’ll allow into our lives.

They can affect everything- your relationships, your confidence, even how you care for yourself.

But here’s the good news: these beliefs aren’t permanent. They were learned, and that means they can be unlearned.

What Are Limiting Beliefs?

A self-limiting belief is a quiet but powerful story you tell yourself about what you can’t do, don’t deserve, or will never have.

They often masquerade as truth: “I’m not good with money.” “I’ll always be alone.” “That kind of peace isn’t for people like me.”

At their core, limiting beliefs are survival mechanisms or mental shortcuts your brain created long ago to protect you from pain, rejection, or disappointment.

The problem is, what once kept you “safe” now keeps you small.

They operate in the background, guiding your choices, shaping your boundaries, and even influencing who you attract and how you show up in relationships.

Where Do limiting Beliefs Come From?

Limiting beliefs rarely appear out of nowhere. They’re usually planted early, watered by experience, and solidified by repetition.

Family and upbringing

Many of our core beliefs were modeled for us. Maybe love looked like earning approval. Maybe money was always scarce. Maybe expressing emotion wasn’t safe. What we see in childhood becomes what we believe to be “normal.”

Past experiences and trauma.

When something painful happens — betrayal, loss, rejection — the mind scrambles to make sense of it. We tell ourselves, “It’s my fault,” or “I should’ve known better.” These interpretations become emotional armor that eventually turns heavy.

Society and comparison

We live in a culture that thrives on “not enoughness.” Not thin enough, not young enough, not successful enough. When we internalize those messages, we start viewing ourselves through a distorted lens of lack instead of worthiness.

Unhealed emotional wounds

The deeper the wound, the stronger the belief. Without awareness and compassion, those old emotions can harden into quiet rules like, “Don’t trust people,” or “You always have to do everything yourself.”

The truth is, these beliefs aren’t proof of who you are — they’re echoes of where you’ve been.

How Limiting Beliefs Show Up in Everyday Life

Self-limiting beliefs don’t always announce themselves loudly. They slip quietly into your habits, your relationships, and your self-talk.

You might notice them in those small moments of hesitation — the pause before setting a boundary, the second-guessing before sharing something creative, or that inner voice that tells you to play it safe instead of showing up fully.

They often sound like self-doubt (“I can’t handle that”), guilt (“I don’t deserve rest”), or perfectionism (“If I can’t do it perfectly, I won’t do it at all”).

Sometimes, they’re so woven into the rhythm of your daily life that you mistake them for truth.

Here are a few places self-limiting beliefs show up in our lives:

Limiting Beliefs in Relationships

Beliefs around love and worth often sound like, “I’m too much,” “I’ll just get hurt again,” or “I have to earn love to keep it.” These ideas can cause us to settle, over-give, or stay silent when something doesn’t feel right.

Healing means remembering that a healthy connection doesn’t require shrinking yourself.

Limiting Beliefs about Money (or Scarcity Mindset)

Many of us carry inherited limiting beliefs about money. Stories passed down from family or culture. Maybe you learned that wanting more is greedy, or that financial security isn’t meant for “people like you.”

These thoughts and scarcity mindset can quietly limit your ability to receive, save, or build something sustainable. Rewriting them means allowing abundance to feel safe.

Limiting Beliefs about Work and Creativity

Self-limiting beliefs often hide behind professionalism or perfectionism. They whisper, “I’m not ready,” or “Someone else could do it better.”

You might undercharge, overwork, or hide your creative gifts out of fear of judgment. Reframing these beliefs helps you show up with courage instead of comparison.

Limiting Beliefs about your Body and Self-Image

For many women, the most relentless critic lives in the mirror. Beliefs like “I’ll be happy when I lose weight” or “I’m too old to feel beautiful” rob us of joy in the present moment.

Healing here is about shifting from control to compassion—nourishing your body because it’s home, not because it needs fixing.

Limiting Beliefs around your Emotional and Mental Health

You might believe you have to “hold it all together,” or that needing help means weakness.

These beliefs can keep you isolated and exhausted. True wellness comes from allowing yourself to be fully human—imperfect, emotional, and worthy of support.

Limiting Beliefs about your Personal Growth

Sometimes the most stubborn story is, “It’s too late.” Maybe you think you’re too old to change, start over, or dream again.

But growth doesn’t expire. It’s never too late to learn new patterns, discover new passions, or reintroduce yourself to life.

When you start noticing how these beliefs show up, you can meet them with curiosity instead of shame. You can ask, “Is this really true?” or “Is this thought helping me live the life I want?”

That moment of awareness—right there—is the beginning of transformation.

And here’s the sneaky part: limiting beliefs often feel comfortable. Familiar. Like home.

Because in some way, these beliefs have been part of your identity for so long that imagining life without them feels almost foreign.

But comfort doesn’t always mean safety. Sometimes it just means “what we’ve always known.” And once you start seeing these patterns for what they are — learned stories, not life sentences — that’s when real change begins.

How to Begin Letting Go of Limiting Beliefs

Change starts with awareness. Everytime. You can’t heal what you won’t look at-but once you see it, you can choose differently.

Notice the narrative

Pay attention to your thoughts when you feel fear, shame, or frustration. What story are you telling yourself in that moment? Write it down.

Get curious, not critical

Ask yourself, “Where did I learn this?” or “Who told me this was true?” Curiosity softens resistance and helps you see the belief for what it is — just information from your past, not your identity.

Reframe the story

Instead of trying to erase the belief, rewrite it in a way that honors where you’ve been and where you’re going.

limiting belief example: “I’m terrible with boundaries” becomes “I’m learning how to protect my peace.”

Anchor in new evidence

Your brain believes what it sees most often. Each time you act in alignment with your new truth — by saying no, taking a risk, or practicing self-care — you create new neural pathways that reinforce it.

Give yourself grace

Healing limiting beliefs isn’t a one-time event; it’s a practice.

Some days you’ll still hear the old story whispering in the background. That’s okay. It’s proof that you’re growing.

Overcoming Limiting Beliefs: A Gentle Roadmap

Healing the thoughts that hold you back isn’t about pretending to be positive all the time. It’s about creating a warm, safe space inside yourself—and sometimes with others—to gently explore where those beliefs originated and what they still need from you.

This approach allows you to understand and heal at your own pace, fostering kindness and compassion throughout your journey.

Self-Awareness

Everything begins with noticing. Pause long enough to hear your inner dialogue and name what you find. “I see you, fear.” “I hear you, old story.”

Awareness is a form of self-love because it says, I’m willing to listen instead of run. Sometimes journaling or talking it out in therapy helps you spot patterns that are hard to see on your own.

For me, working with a trauma-informed therapist has helped me to connect the dots between past experiences and current beliefs without shame or self-blame. 🙂

Compassion

Once you’ve named the belief, meet it with kindness. Every limiting belief was born to protect you, maybe from rejection, criticism, or hurt.

It’s just been trying too hard for too long. Instead of pushing it away, try whispering gratitude:

“Thank you for trying to keep me safe, but I don’t need you to do that anymore.” Healing happens faster when it’s drenched in gentleness, not judgment.

Choice

Here’s where your power returns. You get to decide what’s true for you now. What would a more loving, grounded version of this belief sound like?

Limiting belief examples:

“I’m not good enough” becomes “I’m learning and growing every day.”
“I can’t trust anyone” becomes “I’m learning what safe connection looks like.”

Consistency

New beliefs need nurturing, just like any new habit. Every time you practice the new thought by setting a boundary, choosing rest, or speaking kindly to yourself you’re teaching your brain a new truth. Repetition builds reality.

That might mean attending therapy regularly, joining a women’s circle or support group, or even finding a friend who’s also doing this inner work so you can hold each other accountable.

Remember: Healing grows stronger in community.

The Role of Self-Care in Reprogramming Self-Limiting Beliefs

True self-care goes far beyond the occasional candlelit bath or spa day. It’s not about luxury, it’s about healing.

It’s the ongoing practice of re-parenting yourself with kindness, giving your mind and body the safety they didn’t always have, and reminding yourself daily: I am allowed to rest, receive, and grow.

When you practice intentional self-care, you’re not just soothing stress; you’re retraining your nervous system to believe that life can be safe, calm, and nurturing. Each gentle act tells your body, “I don’t have to live in survival mode anymore.”

Every time you choose care over criticism, compassion over pressure, or rest over hustle, you’re rewriting the inner script that says you have to earn your worth.

Over time, those quiet choices become new beliefs — ones built on self-trust and love instead of fear.

The Role of Self-Care to Reprogram Self-Limiting Beliefs

Rest without guilt.

Give yourself permission to pause. Resting when you’re tired teaches your body that peace isn’t something you have to deserve- it’s something you’re worthy of right now.

Journaling and reflection.

Writing helps you make sense of your thoughts and trace your patterns. Try journaling about where a belief came from, how it’s shown up in your life, and what truth you want to believe instead.

Creative expression

Painting, writing, gardening, singing, whatever lets your inner self play, helps you reconnect with your authenticity. Creativity heals the parts of you that were told to “be quiet” or “play small.”

Mindful movement.

Yoga, stretching, walking, or dancing reconnects you to your body — the place where many limiting beliefs are stored. Movement reminds you that you are strong, capable, and alive.

Spending time in nature.

Nature has a grounding energy that helps regulate your nervous system. Step outside, feel your feet on the earth, breathe deeply, and remember that growth happens quietly, over time.

Positive self-talk and affirmations.

The words you speak to yourself matter. Replace inner criticism with gentleness. Try phrases like, “I am learning to trust myself,” or “I am safe to change.”

Nourishing your body.

Eat foods that give you energy and hydration, not punishment. Self-care starts with respecting your physical needs, not ignoring them.

Setting healthy boundaries.

Boundaries are one of the most powerful forms of self-care. Saying “no” when something drains you isn’t rejection — it’s protection. It teaches your nervous system that your peace matters.

Gratitude and mindfulness.

Each time you notice what’s good, you shift from scarcity to abundance. Gratitude helps your brain look for possibilities instead of proof that you’re lacking.

Therapy or coaching.

A trained therapist or trauma-informed coach can help you unpack old conditioning and guide you toward healthier thought patterns. It’s self-care on a deep, emotional level — one that rewires old beliefs at their roots.

The Role of Therapy in Overcoming Limiting Beliefs

Sometimes awareness and self-reflection aren’t enough on their own, especially when your limiting beliefs are rooted in old wounds, trauma, or deep emotional pain.

That’s where therapy can be life-changing.

A skilled therapist helps you trace your beliefs back to their origin. Maybe that voice of self-doubt sounds a lot like a critical parent, or maybe it grew from years of trying to stay safe in unpredictable relationships.

Therapy offers a safe, compassionate space to unpack those layers without judgment.

Through approaches like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), inner-child work, or trauma-informed therapy, you begin to notice the link between thought and behavior, and learn how to interrupt it.

I’ve found that therapy has given me a language and the words I never had for what I’d been feeling.

That language becomes power. It helps to express needs, set boundaries, and cultivate healthier relationships.

What God Got to Say about Our Limiting Beliefs

Scripture repeatedly shows God challenging limiting beliefs. When Moses said “I can’t speak well” (Exodus 4:10), God reminded him “Who gave human beings their mouths?” When Gideon protested “My clan is the weakest” (Judges 6:15), God called him a “mighty warrior.”

These stories reveal that our self-imposed limitations often contradict God’s vision for us.

Key Biblical Principles About Limiting Beliefs:

We’re Called to Renew Our Minds

Romans 12:2 tells us “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” God knows our thought patterns shape our reality and calls us to actively challenge beliefs that don’t align with His truth.

Faith Over Fear

2 Timothy 1:7 reminds us “God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” Those limiting beliefs rooted in fear? They’re not from God.

Nothing Is Impossible with God

Luke 1:37 declares “For nothing will be impossible with God.” Matthew 19:26 echoes this: “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Our limiting beliefs often forget to factor in God’s unlimited power.

We Can Do All Things Through Christ

Philippians 4:13 – “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” This directly confronts the limiting belief of “I can’t.”

Truth Sets Us Free

John 8:32 promises “You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” Many limiting beliefs are simply lies we’ve believed about ourselves, and God’s truth liberates us from these mental prisons.

The bottom line? God consistently calls us to faith over fear, possibility over limitation, and His strength over our weakness. 🙂

Conclusion: Breaking Free of Limiting Beliefs

I’ve learned that freedom doesn’t come from fixing yourself — it comes from remembering you were never broken.

The more you question the old stories, the more space you make for peace, purpose, and joy.

And every time you choose kindness over criticism, every time you set a boundary, every time you show yourself compassion, you’re not just changing your thoughts. You’re changing your life.

You’ve got this, Sister!

XO, Christine